COFFEEby Singapore Film Commission (1999/2007)
A Short Film by
Jeannette Teo, Scriptwriter
Script Written 1999, Revised 2007
youtube: https://youtu.be/PilVLkvnK2g
SCRIPT: COFFEE, A SHORT FILM
Scene 1: Opening Montage
Fade from black.
Left half screen is black. Right half screen shows people ordering and drinking coffee at the busy coffeshop. Visuals are supported with the authentic ambience sounds at the local coffeshop, eg. rough clink-clang sounds of coffee cups and spoons, shouts of orders “Coppee zik pueh”, etc. Left half screen shows white text on black - credits.
Now switch sides. Left half screen shows modern, western café where youngsters and caucasians drink coffee. Right half screen continues with credits. Sound effects – youngsters slanging their english, clanging of forks and spoons and coffee cups, quieter, more “refined” atmosphere compared to the local coffeeshop.
Now a visual box appears as if the screen ratio is 7:2 (movie long format) to show SOO LI making a sandwich in the kitchen (morning – we see the time on the clock). She reaches for the coffee powder but finds no more. She suddenly remembers she had forgotten to buy a new bottle. She stares at the empty bottle for a while.
Text appears – title of the story. (COFFEE)
Scene 2: Int. Bedroom, Morning.
Sounds coming from various units in an HDB flat - baby crying, TV, alarm clock ringing. HAROLD wakes up looking tired. Soo Li walks in and starts to make the bed. She pats the pillows violently and Harold’s nose starts to itch.
SOO LI
You’re going to be late.
Harold grunts, annoyed, and starts sneezing loudly.
SOO LI
(looks disgusted as Harold blows his nose into his T-shirt)
I’m so sick of living in this filthy, insiduous HDB flat.
HAROLD
(through his T-shirt)
Nothing wrong with this flat what.
Soo Li continues to make the bed and pushes Harold out. Harold goes to the bathroom. At the same time, Soo Li looks at herself in the mirror – she is a career woman and she checks if she has put on weight.
SOO LI
Why can’t we upgrade to a condo? Now’s the right time to buy.
HAROLD
(from the bathroom)
No money.
SOO LI
Everybody takes a bank loan, so…
HAROLD
(from the bathroom)
So… I don’t want to be like everybody, that’s why we’re not in debt, OK?
SOO LI
All my 3 sisters live in condos, you know.
HAROLD
(from the bathroom)
Having a condo doesn’t mean you have a better life! And, if your sisters look down on you, ignore them, lah!
SOO LI
Pompous cheapskate!
Harold sings in the shower – a popular Chinese song. He’s either ignoring the remark or he didn’t hear it.
SOO LI
Wei!
HAROLD
What?
SOO LI
You cannot be too contented with your life. No ambitions and no dreams get you nowhere!
HAROLD
(from the bathroom)
I got ambition what.
SOO LI
Like what?
HAROLD
(sticks head out of bathroom)
A baby boy!
SOO LI
Hmmph!
Soo Li walks out of the bedroom.
Scene 3: Int. Kitchen
DISSOLVE: Harold walks to the kitchen to look for his nail clipper which he had hidden in the cutlery drawer. He cuts his nails at the kitchen table while Soo Li drinks her special tea. She frowns at him while he cuts his nails at the table but she says nothing, as if resigned to this habit of his.
HAROLD
So, if I splash all my savings on that new condo, will you make me a baby boy?
SOO LI
You hope, er.
HAROLD
Why not?
SOO LI
No.
HAROLD
(Disappointed grunt)
Aiyah…
SOO LI
(suddenly remembers…)
Eh, my mom’s birthday dinner tonight. Don’t be late, OK?
HAROLD
I don’t mind a baby girl.
SOO LI
(irritated, frowning)
Tsk!
HAROLD
I’m sure your mom doesn’t mind either…
SOO LI
Talk about mom… she’s still angry with you.
HAROLD
For what?
SOO LI
You were one hour late!
HAROLD
(cheeky)
How about you, are you late?
(takes out a pregnancy test kit from the kitchen drawer)
HAROLD
Hey! I bought a pregnancy test kit, just in case…
(Soo Li glares at him)
SOO LI
Babies make you fat.
HAROLD
I don’t mind.
(pause)
SOO LI
No.
(silence)
HAROLD
Eh? Where’s my coffee?
SOO LI
Forgot to buy.
HAROLD
(now not cheerful)
AH! No coffee!
SOO LI
Won’t die lah.
HAROLD
(quite upset)
Alamak!
SOO LI
Got tea, milo, horlicks…
She reveals a whole range of beverages in the cabinet. There’s everything except coffee.
SOO LI
Nah, help yourself!
HAROLD
Aiyah!
SOO LI
Later buy some coffee back on the way home, lah! Nah, bread.
Harold pokes the bread.
SOO LI
(leaving the flat)
Don’t forget, ah, reach home by seven. Mom’s birthday tonight…
HAROLD
How come you never visit MY mom on HER birthday?
SOO LI
Wei! I’m talking to you… Seven SHARP, OK?
Harold waves his hand.
SOO LI
Ooi!
HAROLD
Ya.
SOO LI
Seven O’clock…
HAROLD
Ya.
SOO LI
I’m going.
HAROLD
Ya.
Soo Li goes off to work while Harold pokes the bread again and decides he doesn’t want to eat it.
He goes to look for his coffee. He finds the empty tin in the dustbin. He picks it up from the dustbin. There is just half a teaspoon of coffee powder left. He decides to make his coffee but with less water. He pours hot water from a flask but the cover/top drops off and floods the cup with hot water, scalding his hand a little.
Scene 4: Ext. Coffeeshop
(dialogue is in dialect – Hokkein - with subtitles)
On his way to work, Harold goes to the coffeeshop to get a cup of coffee. While waiting, he starts poking at the variety of bread they sell there.
The GRUMPY OLD MAN (serving drinks) sees him poking the bread and scolds him in dialect.
GRUMPY OLD MAN
(sees Harold poking bread, speaks in dialect)
Ooi! This is for eating one! Don’t poke the damn bread… everyday come here and poke my bread… you mad or what?
Harold looks sheepish and gestures an apology but doesn’t say anything. The old man gives Harold a cup of tea. Harold stares at the tea and looks uneasy.
HAROLD
(in dialect)
This is tea, leh…
GRUMPY OLD MAN
(in dialect)
Ya, you ordered tea what…
HAROLD
(in dialect)
No, I ordered coffee.
GRUMPY OLD MAN
(irritated, in dialect)
Just now you say tea.
HAROLD
(in dialect)
Don’t have. I said coppee.
GRUMPY OLD MAN
(in dialect)
If you’re in the wrong, say so lah! You young men got no manners. So how? Take the tea OK?
HAROLD
(in dialect)
I’d rather have coppee… Usually I order tea for my wife, but she’s not here today… Uncle, give me coppee, ok?
GRUMPY OLD MAN
(pause, looking angry. Then he shouts the order)
Coppee!
HAROLD
(in dialect)
Aiyah! Sorry, sorry, uncle! I want Coppee O THICK! Can change or not?
The grumpy old man glares at Harold. During the brief and uncomfortable pause, Harold looks uneasy and pathetic. The grumpy old man finally shouts the correct order, still glaring at Harold.
GRUMPY OLD MAN
(in dialect)
Coppee change to Coppee O
(grumbles to himself)
Everytime like that…
Another uncomfortable silence. The coffee finally arrives and the old man serves Harold.
GRUMPY OLD MAN
(in dialect)
70 cents.
Harold hands the Grumpy Old Man a $50 note and gets a dirty look from the old man.
HAROLD
(in dialect)
Sorry, Uncle, no change… Er, Uncle, can add a bit more sugar?
(the old man glares at him)
HAROLD
(in dialect)
Uncle… add… (gestures)
The grumpy old man then snatches Harold’s cup of coffee, spits into it and hands it back to Harold.
GRUMPY OLD MAN
(in dialect)
Worse than a woman!
Scene 5: Public Transport
Harold takes public transport. He uses the bus and MRT. He sees children everywhere, especially babies. Sometimes he makes faces at babies to make them laugh. It’s a long journey. Eventually, he falls asleep on the way to work.
Scene 6: Int. Office/Factory (Food business)
Harold (MCU) looks expressionless but at certain points quite desperate as if the silence is making him more and more nervous and agitated. (maybe he twitches uncontrollably somewhere on his face?).
Cut to his BOSS (MCU) looking so angry that he is speechless for a moment. He can only gasp like a goldfish and shake his head in frustration. They sit there in uncomfortable silence. The boss takes a sip of coffee, trying to “cool down” but stares at Harold anyway.
OUTSIDE THE BOSS’S OFFICE
Everything is peaceful, pleasant. Then, we hear shouting from inside the Boss’s office…
BOSS
(VO - shouting)
What kind of a salesman are you!?!
INSIDE THE BOSS’S OFFICE
CU Harold blinking. He starts to wipe off some coffee/spit that has landed onto his face.
BOSS
You call this work? You tell me, what have you been doing? Customers are complaining and what are you doing?
But all Harold sees is his boss’s coffee on the table. (coffee cup swaying?)
Harold daydreams about drinking the coffee. A smile appears on Harold’s face (like a twitch), and then…
BOSS
HAROLD!
(Harold “wakes” up)
HAROLD’S WORK PLACE / PANTRY
Finally, Harold comes out of the Boss’s office and goes straight to the pantry to make himself a cup of coffee. His handphone rings. It’s CATHERINE, his ex-girlfriend.
HAROLD
Good morning, Harold speaking. Can I help zu…
CATHERINE
Harold Chong! Thank God!
HAROLD
Who’s this?
CATHERINE
Catherine lah!
Wei! Can lend me money ah?
HAROLD
I just lent you a few thousand last month.
CATHERINE
Gone already lah.
HAROLD
(sigh)
I told you to stay at home and to stop using your credit cards, right?
CATHERINE
You’re such a naggy ex-boyfriend. And yes, I took your advice, I stayed at home.
HAROLD
Then?
CATHERINE
Now I’m pregnant!
HAROLD
Pregnant!
Harold spills his coffee as he almost drops the phone. His colleagues look shocked, some curious.
HAROLD
(whispering)
What do you mean “pregnant”?
Colleagues watch Harold while Harold looks embarrassed.
CATHERINE
Lor soh lah you! Aiyah, I need money! Lend me leh…
HAROLD
For what?
CATHERINE
er... An abortion.
HAROLD
ABORTION!
(colleagues stare)
HAROLD
What the… (stutters)
CATHERINE
I don’t know what else to do!
HAROLD
Aiyah.
CATHERINE
(more composed, weird calm)
I have two options. One, I can spend 20,000 dollars on a wedding, but that’s not going to happen. And two, I can spend a few hundred dollars for an abortion at a nice little private clinic.
HAROLD
CHOY!
CATHERINE
Then how? Can meet me today?
HAROLD
(sees his boss glaring at him, looks uncomfortable)
Like that ah…
CATHERINE
I promise I won’t tell your Princess.
HAROLD
Who?
CATHERINE
Your wife lah! Wei, meet me leh!
HAROLD
(pause)
Scene 7: Int. Cafe
Harold walks along the street and wanders into a café. He stands at the counter looking at the prices of coffee and the wide variety available. At the café, a coffee can cost him from $2.00 to $6.00. He stands there with an open wallet, deciding whether to buy a cup. Suddenly, he has a good idea. He then walks out of the café without buying.
Scene 8: Ext. Outside a 7-11 store
Next scene, he comes out of the 7-11 store smiling, with 2 bottles of coffee powder for his home and a cup of instant coffee. Outside, he starts to drink it (with birds singing in the background) but…
A drop of fresh bird shit just misses him! Harold laughs in relief as it misses him. He walks off quickly and is about to sip his coffee when he slips on a plastic bag.
Scene 9: Int. Catherine’s Kitchen
Next scene, Catherine is putting medicine on his elbow. On the table is the first aid box, Harold’s coffee powder from 7-11, his handphone, wallet and a cup of stale coffee. Harold is staring curiously at the cup of stale coffee…
HAROLD
(looking into the cup)
Coffee! Eh, can drink or not?
CATHERINE
No, cannot.
HAROLD
Is it THAT hard to have ONE sip of coffee?
CATHERINE
You wouldn’t want that. It’s yesterday’s coffee.
HAROLD
Nevermind…
CATHERINE
Wei!
HAROLD
(drinks the coffee before Catherine can stop him)
You have NO idea how terrible the day is without coffee!
He drinks the coffee with a smile on his face. Halfway through, he finds a dead lizard in his coffee and throws up all the coffee in the sink. Catherine laughs at him but not for long. Her overly jealous boyfriend, SAM comes back to find Harold with Catherine.
SAM
(almost shouting)
Who the hell is this?
(Harold also gestures a surprise “Who is this?”)
CATHERINE
Er, Harold.
(uncomfortable pause)
CATHERINE
Oh, Harold, meet Sam, my boyfriend. Sam, this is Harold.
Harold looks dazed, unsure of what to do. Catherine takes Harold’s coffee powder and rattles on.
CATHERINE
Harold brought me some coffee, see?
HAROLD
(extends his hand awkwardly)Hello, Sam, it’s nice to meet…
SAM
(ignores Harold)
Harold? Your ex-boyfriend?
CATHERINE
Ya, very ex… er, actually, I was out of coffee and he offered to come over…
SAM
He WHAT? You two very close huh… hanky panky behind my back!
CATHERINE
No, no, no, you don’t understand…
SAM
I just SAW you and him…
HAROLD
(cuts in suddenly)
I, er… I was nearby, so I decided to come…
SAM
You... stay away from her!
Sam punches Harold in the face. Catherine reacts by covering her eyes and pinching her forehead.
Scene 10: Int. Kitchen
The clock reads 7.30pm. (sound effect of clock ticking very loudly) Harold walks in with a bruise on his face and finds Soo Li waiting, looking very angry.
SOO LI
(furious but her voice is soft, trying not to blow)
7.30 already. I told you NOT to be late!
(sees the bruise on Harold’s face)
SOO LI
Aiyoh! Look at you! What did you do?!
HAROLD
Nothing, lah.
SOO LI
(screaming)
I don’t care! You better explain to my mom why you’re late OK?
HAROLD
A little bit late only what…
SOO LI
It’s all your fault!!
HAROLD
OK, OK, my fault. I’m sorry. Come, let’s go.
SOO LI
(not moving but waving bank book, looking very furious)
And look at this…
HAROLD
What?
SOO LI
$4000 withdrawal last month. Take out for what?
HAROLD
Can we talk about this later? Let’s go, quick…
SOO LI
No money to buy condo but got money to spend!
HAROLD
(quiet)
SOO LI
(shouting)
What did you DO with $4000?!
(pause)
SOO LI
WEI!
HAROLD
I lent it to a friend.
SOO LI
WHAT?! WHO?
HAROLD
(long pause)
… er, Catherine.
SOO LI
AH! Why you lend her!
HAROLD
She needs the money what.
SOO LI
We also need the money, what! You rather give money to your ex-girlfriend than your own wife!
HAROLD
She’ll give back one.
SOO LI
When I ask you for anything, you say no money. Catherine asks, wah, $4000 comes out of OUR bank account!
Door bell rings. Catherine walks in.
CATHERINE
(cheerfully)
Yoo Hoo… Harold? hey, your door was wide open... i,uh..
(sees Soo Li)
Oh! Eh, Hi, Soo Li, you’re home early. Hey, Harold, you forgot your coffee, handphone and wallet, so careless! Left them all at my place…
SOO LI
(shouting at Harold)
You WENT to HER flat?
HAROLD
Oh, er, nothing lah, just… umm… just visiting.
CATHERINE
Ya, he came to talk about my… oh, er, my new boyfriend.
SOO LI
Oh? And Catherine, thanks for borrowing our $4000.
CATHERINE
Huh? Oh, that…
SOO LI
(sacarstic) oh, that?!!
(Catherine sighs)
CATHERINE
Tell you the truth lah, Soo Li, I’m pregnant and I need money…
SOO LI
Pregnant!?! You… and Harold!?!
CATHERINE & HAROLD
No, no, no, yes, no
(all 3 look confused)
SOO LI
(to Catherine)
I KNEW IT! You seduced him! You’re such a SLUT!
CATHERINE
What? Hey!! Wait a minute...
SOO LI
(to Harold)
And you… you... you...
(so angry until speechless) You’re both DISGUSTING!
CATHERINE
No, no, no, no no... listen, it just happened, I tried…
SOO LI
You BITCH! And all along i thought you were my friend!!
CATHERINE
Listen, lah! I’m trying to explain to you…
SOO LI
What’s there to explain?!!
Soo Li and Catherine argue but Harold only hears nonsense coming out of their mouths. After a while of arguing, Soo Li turns to Harold and slaps him hard across the face.
CATHERINE
Ouch…
Reaction shot for all 3.
Then Soo Li turns around and slaps Catherine on the face.
HAROLD
Ouch…
Reaction shot for all 3.
Soo Li raises her hand to slap Catherine again but Catherine blocks the slaps and accidentally pushes Soo Li. Soo Li falls to the floor, looks extremely angry and humiliated. She then kicks Catherine in the leg from the floor.
Suddenly Catherine is on the floor with Soo Li. They struggle. Catherine pulls Soo Li’s hair while Soo Li continues kicking.
CUTAWAY to arcade game – 2 women fighting… with SFX.
When Harold tries to break them up, Soo Li’s and Catherine’s heads accidentally bang against each other. Both become unconscious.
Harold stands there stumped.
After a while, he makes himself a cup of very very very strong coffee (with the coffee powder brought over by Catherine, which he bought at 7-11). He takes a long, satisfying sip and sighs contentedly.
SUPER Text:
The moral of the story is:
A. Don’t get addicted to coffee.
B. No matter what happens, drink your coffee.
C. Sometimes you have to settle for tea, milo or horlicks.
CLOSING SEQUENCE
END OF SCRIPT
